Wednesday, March 19, 2003

 

Tee-hee-hee. A letter to the president from Michael Moore.

We're now at T-minus 1 hour.

In several ironic twists, (a) the threat of terrorism has enriched me to the tune of $400 in the last two days, as shares of HGSI have soared on news that they're developing an Anthrax drug, and (b) I spent last night playing Medal Of Honor for the first time, instead of preparing for the class I know I'm going to miss on Thursday because I'll be walking out in protest of the war.

Pogue Colonel: Marine, what is that button on your body armor?
Private Joker: A peace symbol, sir.
Pogue Colonel: Where'd you get it?
Private Joker: I don't remember, sir.
Pogue Colonel: What is that you've got written on your helmet?
Private Joker: "Born to Kill," sir.
Pogue Colonel: You write "Born to Kill" on your helmet and you wear a peace button. What's that supposed to be, some kind of sick joke?!
Private Joker: No, sir.
Pogue Colonel: You'd better get your head and your ass wired together, or I will take a giant shit on you!
Private Joker: Yes, sir.
Pogue Colonel: Now answer my question or you'll be standing tall before the man.
Private Joker: I think I was trying to suggest something about the duality of man, sir.
Pogue Colonel: The what?
Private Joker: The duality of man. The Jungian thing, sir.

- Full Metal Jacket

The thing is, I do feel a kind of excitement, right alongside my feelings of apprehension and sorrow, and totally independent from my intellectual analysis and criticism of the (lack of) justification for war. War is compelling. Especially, I guess, when you don't have to actually participate. If the U.S. government wanted to, it could pay for this war in its entirety by selling it as a pay-per-view reality TV show. As is, we do get Ted Koppel Embedded in the Army's Third Infantry Division, but we won't actually get the good stuff live, due to, you know, concerns about giving away {troop positions / tactics / evidence of us killing civilians}.

When it comes down to the reality of war that we're facing, I (like most, I think) simply hope for a quick war, with as few casualties as possible . . . and, uh, some really cool video montages from tank battles and dogfights and Marines shooting it out with snipers in Baghdad and . . . and "what the fuck am I saying?", right? - but it is what it is.

posted by Miles 7:00 PM